We went to class. He sat on the opposite side of the room, that i was thankful for. Hunter Cody and Sandra all sat around my table. I was dreading the group peer evaluation we had to complete. That would mean he and i would have to be so close. I didn't know how much of that i could bear. He sat right beside. That pretentious jerk. Right in hunters spot. I did my best to ignore him and not once did we make eye contact. I was almost successful and not dealing with him at all but when the peer eval was done he asked me about another project i was completing and how that was going. I quickly and sharply responded to his small talk questions. Before I knew it my hell was over. It was time for him to move back to his seat. As everyone began the shuffle he realized his seat was still taken. Before he could sit beside me Cody sat next to me. I have never been so pleased with a friend as I was in that exact moment. Cody made sure his group was never far from mine and he was monitoring my whole situation the entire time. When he noticed what was transpiring he diffused the situation. I was so grateful.
Then class was really over. Hunter and I went to the learning commons at school to work on our maps. As we rounded he corner, my stomach dropped. There he was sitting with her. I wanted to scream and cry. I wanted to punch him and her and run home to my bed. I didn't do any of those things. I caught my head and shoulders start to drop. I quickly picked myself up, took a deep breath and marched right passed them. He proceeded to sit and work with her right there. Right in front of me. Just a week after telling me there was nothing going on between them. I find that very hard to believe.
I got my work done and went to visit with Mike Fraser. Needless o say I was not feeling very good about myself. How could he replace me that quickly. What had i done wrong. Why wasn't I, why aren't I good enough. I met with Mike and after talking with him I felt like my old self again. And I realized the answer to all of those questions. He replaced me that quickly because he thought he found something better. I didn't do anything wrong. I am good enough. I may not remember that with every tick of the clock but I am enough. I am enough for those people who love me. I am enough for myself. Which is all that really matters.
After that i was in a great mood. I got so much accomplished in my day.
There was a new development. One i never saw coming. A boy in my class started talking to me today. Initiating a conversation outside of school, outside of the classroom and outside of homework. He's a guy i never thought would. I'm slowly realizing I have more friends than I thought. Fleming has given me something i thought i had at home but I have come to realize I only had a blood family. Fleming has given me a second family, a second home. When I am with these people i realize that I love this place and i don't ever want to leave. I love the person I can be at his place and he person it forces me to be. I am a much better person because of fleming. I came here never knowing who I am or what I am supposed to do with my life. But since coming here I think my path, as twisted and turning as it is, is becoming more and more obvious to me.
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